Me, Myself and I

Psychopath at large *G*

Everybody has skeletons in the closet.

If You want to meet new friends, starting out on a lie, is probably okay, but not for me.

I'm not ashamed about who I am, or who I was. I prefer people to know.
So They know what they got, no nasty surprises. And If they don't like people who is a bit different, eccentric or strange. Well then they can just stay away.

My skeleton : I'm NUTS !!!


Official statistics says 4 of 10 people has a mental illness, and most is silent about it, not me. Nothing to be shameful about.

Some years ago, I was diagnosed as a anti-social neurotic, and manic depressive. Which I probably have been all my life, which explains alot about the 40 years I didnt know, I had a mental illness.

About me:

51 years old, and beginning to feel it.

Computer since 1981 - vic-20. 1983 - c-64, 1987 - amiga.

Well not exactly true, my first was a old business computer back in the 70s, but that wasent really more than crap.

Involved in demo community. (lots of prizes, mostly for music composing).

With a friend, invented the first freezer/turbo cartridge for the c-64, 1983, a year before the Action Replay people marketed theirs. And I got the code published in the German C-64 magazine and got second prize for software of the year

Nicks : CyberManiac (Yes, I am the Original, Me. Got the Nick 1984, because I drove everybody at a computer gathering crazy with my passion for William Gibsons Neuromancer).

and Animal (due to my beard and my past as a drummer in a punkband)

Demogroups: KEERBI, Procom, Anarchy.dk, Andromeda.

Was involved in starting up the official danish "Vic-20 usergroup" in 1982, Later renamed to the official danish "The Commodore Usergroup".

and with some danish, german and swedish guys starting up "The Computer UserGroup International" umbrella organization, of 1985,

and "The Computer Gamers Society" of 1985, which made their first and only Gamers worldchampionships, back in 1985.

Which of course was most for fun, but for my merits : I did win 2 worldchampionships, and placed 2 or 3rd in 3 other diciplines.

(and there was 50 participants, from Denmark, Germany, Sweden, Norway, France, UK and Benelux so I was not that bad).

By the way, on paper, The organizations still excists although, there has been no meetings in 19 years.

PC since 1993.

Internet since 1995.

Lifebroadcasting since 1996 at the beginning not much, maybe 5-10 hours a day, that changed when I got flatrate to almost 24/7.


Merits:

In 50 years you should have made something, I made my merits in a short period of time late 70s - early 80s.

1975 invented a now famous little drink. "en kande".

The Original: 6cl Pernod, 1 carlsberg citron, 1 tuborg beer, 1 tuborg gold, 1 carlsberg porter (or a Guiness).
For non-danes (the taste is not perfect, but ok): 6cl pernod, a citrussoda, and a pint of Half-and-half.

I won the local pinball championships, and represented my city at the danish championships.
(not placed though, I was eliminated, and ended up 25th-30th)

Disc Jockey Danish Championships. Local champion. Didnt win the danish championships, unfortunately.

And even worse my then girlfriend was placed third in Miss Denmark, and 6th in miss young universe contests. and my former girlfriend won Miss Denmark (and married the Judge, go figure), so I was really picked on.

Danish College champion in Volleyball.

Drummer in a punkband 1979-1980.

With a friend, invented the first freezer/turbo cartridge for the c-64, 1983, a year before the Action Replay people marketed theirs. And I got the code publishd in the German C-64 magazine.

Involved in demo community. (lots of prizes, mostly for music composing).

Made more than a thousand tunes, around 100 of then were published on the shareware cd's, which was released with the Commodore CD-TV.

Allthough Commodore never asked for my permission to publish, I was still flattered.

When I found out, Commodore did send me a copy of the cd's, but unfortunately not a CD-TV, so I had to buy one myself.

Released 10-15 tapes with own tunes and remixes. And was dragged into court for copyright violations, becourse of one of the remixes. Settled out of court. (the mix was made of love to the music and the musician, the artist understood, and dropped the case).

Placed 2nd in the danish Army championships for marksmen. My friend K *asshole :)*, became the champion, and never lets me forget, allthough its 29 years ago.

Publications:

Made a few articles for the german c-64 magazine, and for the official commodore user magazine.

Wrote some manuals for hard- and software. Translated some manuals for hard- and software.

Got a collection of Poetry published (It wasent any good and only sold between 50-100, to libraries).

For my social sciences degree: A shorter dissertation about "the social conditions for early retirement".

and a large dissertation "child abuse : thesis and solution proposals about interdisciplinary co-operation, early detection, treatment, ect."

published by the social high school, university of odense, 1986. (400 pages, danish).

The Later years no metits to speak about.

Volunteer and committee work in various organizations, such as the tenants' association, the childrens abuse helpline, various computer associations

and on the board of trustees in a couple of Nature conservation related Trusts. (together with a few others I bought a castleruin in Scotland 2003, we intent to restore)

I also own various plots of woodland in Scotland, with intentions to move there eventualy.

2005: I placed 7th in the 1/4 final (non-licensed group) of the Bowling Pro tour (local qualification for world cup).

2006: season 2005-2006. Proudly placed 2nd in my Bowlingclub, only 120 pins from the championship. (16.000pins - 15.880 pins).

2006: Was in the last three in the 1/4 final (non-licensed group) of the Bowling Pro tour (local qualification for world cup).

I did drop out on purpose, refused to start and was DQ'ed, so I could get to Jelling Music festival (14 days ago) instead (I had promised a local band to record them and make photos.)

I don't know if it counts to my merits: but due to my hard work as a socialworker working with extreme cases including severe child abuse cases. I hope I've done something good to at least some people who had a really bad time.

Negative Merits:

Criminal record:
1975: A fine for for drunk driving (inconnection with my motorcycle accident),

1978: 17 days in jail for treatening behavior against the police (I was totaly plastered, and treatend 4 armed policeofficers with a toygun), funny at the time, I thought.

As I laid, handcuffed, on the floor with a policeman on my back and a gun to my neck, It wasent funny at all.

My friends trying to make me escape from the policecar was funny though. and the 17 days in jail was really boring.

But when I was released all my friends was waiting outside the gate with banners and flags (and lots of beers), THAT was fun :).

Other negative merits:

Anti-social behavior. Shown especialy in my relationships, I have always been blessed with wonderful girlfriends, everyone of them, but when they wanted us to get more seriously envolved, I have always choosen to perform a disappearing act. Always trying to convinse myself I never had the time nor nerve to commit myself.

Self-isolation. When I stopped working, I fell down in a deep psycical black hole, I more or less went into self-isolation. It has been a lot better the last couple of years, but I still prefer my own company.

Me, Myself and I.

I'm a rather eccentric character. Diagnosed as a anti-social neurotic (some years ago, government pension).

Always been addicted to something. Drugs, alcohol, gambling and/or addicted to accumulate knowledge and skills.

Coming from a abusive split very low income home, I had to work to help economical at home.
Started working as a paperboy nights with 12, factoryworker with 14, alcoholic with 16, drug addict with 17, clean but still alcoholic with 22, almost died of the booze with 31. Cold turkey. Since then a very, very moderate alcoholconsume.

My gambling addiction cost me a lot of money and problems, but was cured, when I bought my first computer 1981, and I realized I could get the same thrills, playing games, and working with the computer. So I havent gambled since.

Although I was a user I allways had full time work, and full time education, 18 hour days for around 30 years.

I've probably tried out almost any job. Choir singer, Paperboy, Factoryworker, Merchant sailor, Clerk, Night worker/watchman in a Mental hospital, Driver, Forkliftdriver, D.J., Musician, Army (prof soldier, UN Peacekeeper Cyprus), Bartender, management, Night school teacher, Nursery teacher, Electrician, Compositor, Graphic artist, Layouter, Translator, Social worker (civil servant), and most of all full time survivor.

Passionate Motorcycle rider since I was 15 years old, have ridden anything from 50cc Kreidlers to 1200cc HDs. Member of MCclubs back in the 70s-early 80s.

Mainly lived my life in Denmark, but also 6 months on Cyprus (Un peacekeeper), and 9 months in London, UK. back in the 70s.
And during my year as a Merchant sailor (Looking back: still the best time of my life) I visited most countries in Northern Europe, plus a few others like Cap Verde, Côte d'Ivoire, Nigeria ect.
Looking back I during my life have properly visited most countries in western Europe, except for Greece, Ireland and and a couple smaller countries. and propably half the eastern european countries as well.
I love to travel, during a much needed holyday in the 80s I returned to Scotland and fell in love with the country so much that I bought land there and want to build a house and settle down there some day

1975: invented a now famous little drink. "en kande".

The Original: 6cl Pernod, 1 carlsberg citron, 1 tuborg beer, 1 tuborg gold, 1 carlsberg porter (or a Guiness).

For non-danes (the taste is not perfect, but ok): 6cl pernod, a citrussoda, and a pint of Half-and-half.

1975-85: member of Mensa, for all the right reasons *G*. The meatings were boring me stiff, but it was the best spot on Uni to pick up girls, believe it or not :)

1975: I had a severe motorbike accident, got a bad knee and arm, which some what destroyed my future plans. In the following years I had to stop some educations, due to the fact I wouldnt be able to work with my disabillity, so I ended up on university getting a degree in social sciences.

Due to my own childhood: Dissertation "child abuse : thesis and solution proposals about interdisciplinary co-operation, early detection, treatment, ect." published by the social high school, university of odense, 1986. (400 pages, danish).

1985: Total body colapse, due to years of heavy drinking, hospitalized, given the choice of stopping or die!

Cold Turkey, lost 60 kilo weight in 6 months.

The Child abuse dissertation was a contributory factor when I was employed as a social worker, working with extreme cases including severe child abuse cases, disordered families ect.
Unfortunately I have always had morbid propensity to concentrate to intensive in some subjects. (and working 16-18 hours a day, 7 days a week)
In Denmark we have a weird system of politicians being the bosses of the social services and since politicians are notoriously know to have absolutely no idea about their job and only thinking about how to save money what ever the meens, and not giving a fuck about the human consequences
and after a couple of years of running my head against a wall of stupidity and incompitence, that unfortunately ended up with a young girl comitting suicide after the politicians helping her dad (a very respectable businessman with friends in high placed) destroying the girl. After I got the father send to prison for raping his daughter from she was 7 to 14 years old, I left my job promising myself I never would work in a job where my bosses was incompitent idiot politicians.

My government employer decided to send me into early retirement, meaning they tried to buy my silence by bribing me, I refused, took a few diplomas and started working with DTP, but some 8 years later I realized that it was time to listen to my body and retire.

So I now have got a government pension, much lower but not a bribe, but I still got my addictions, now I am addicted to music and liveconcerts, and I'm still working around 10 hours a day at my computer, but its not the worst addictions to have though.

Education: Several crafts, schools (some educations I completed with a degree, a diploma or certificates, some I gave up, of fycical reasons or if I got bored or uninterested. a number of times I've been enrolled in different courses at the same time.)

Highschool, College, Commercial school (clerk, and years later basic diploma in computer studies, computerscience),
Technical college (electrician, engineer with an academic degree, and later a few diplomas DTP, graphic design, layout, compositor),
army technical college (radar instrument maker) (flunked that one, fucked up the mathexam because I was stoned and drunk),
Folk college (teacher) government approved certificate to teach secondary subjects (major in pedagogy and theory of education, and diploma in graphic design, political science, history).
University (degree in social sciences).

Retirement is hard work

Retirement is hard work, but a hell more fun than working.

When I went into retirement, I at first thought I would get bored stiff, used to work around the clock. And went into self-isolation.

So I got involved in committee work in various organizations. And I picked up on a old favorite of mine: Liveconcerts.

Back in the 70 and 80s, when I had any spare time, I either rode my motorbike or traveled around Europe to see Concerts, and festivals. and I had missed that!

How ever, I'm getting to old for tents and mud, so one festival away from home, a couple of local festivals, and, due to the Wonderful internet, a couple of livestreams from festivals, is what I get these days.

And on top of that, I of course have my local concerts, so I'm happy :), although I havent got time enough.

A couple of concerts a week, a little theater, a lot of music, a few movies, a little television, a lot of computer, a few games as well. Once or twize a week a trip to the local zoo, for a cup of coffee, and relaxing with a little walk among the animals.
Once a week bowling (for my health), and once a week dinner with friends.

I'm also using a lot of time on a newer passion of mine, photography. I hope, i'll get my homepage up and running this year, I've got several thousand concert photos, at the moment, the photos mostly end up on the bands homepages or fanpages, but I would like to publish some of them myself. Well we'll see.

Help, I'm Single *IRONI*

No girlfriend at the moment (but who knows what the future brings), I'm a heterosexual single, never been married, and as far as I know, no kids. (except for Holly of course (daughter of a female friend of mine), a nice 7 year old who a couple of years ago announced, She had desided She wanted me as her dad (poor girl)
I have always wanted to been single, of course I have had various short and long term girlfriends and sexual relationships, but I never had the time nor nerve to commit myself.
My fault solely, I have always been blessed with wonderful girlfriends, everyone of them (well except for one or two), and I have had chances enough to get seriously envolved (has been engaged twize), but I have always choosen to perform a disappearing act.

"WARNING IRONI"

Lately I've reconsidered my options, but unfortunately it seams that the only women available are overweight divorcees with a lot of kids and/or debt, not exactly looking for a relationship, but desperately hunting for a man, any man, before closing time. Sorry girls, not my cup of tea. I might want to commit myself one day, but I am not going to panic, I can wait or do without.

Well, not exactly true, there's a lot of nice girls out there, and they are not desperate at all. The only desperate girls, I meet are the ones, who wants me :)

And thats only natural I think, you probably got to be a little bit desperate or simply nuts, to have a relationship, with an Eccentric Addict.

Two good concerts today.

I attended 2 good concerts today.

Open Air: Fredericia, Denmark: La Mano Ajena (Chile), good music, and a lot of fun, and Fernanda is a darling.

And now they are off to Spain.

Open Air: Middelfart, Denmark: Deep Purple.

Although I must confess, I didnt actualy pay to get in to see Deep Purple, I parked my bike outside, sat down and listened to the concert, I couldnt see the band on stage, but did hear everything.

The festival was sold out, 30,000 audience, but even if I could, I wouldnt have bought a ticket, the rest of the bands (except Status Quo), I saw 14 days ago at the Jelling Festival, so paying 400 bucks just to see Deep Purple is a bit to much for me.